Seven Random Things
Well...my cousin Melanie totally called me out for not having blogged in months. Thanks Mel. So she tagged me to play "Seven Random Things" on my blog. So here goes...
1. I think I've used this one before, but it's probably my biggest quirk...I have a lot of food issues. I mean, a lot. I pledge to write a book about this one day...not that it would be interesting, just that I'll have a lot of material to work with.
2. I have developed this insane need to collect coupons. I hardly ever use them, but it's become compuslive for me to save them until they expire. Luckily, I only save the ones I think I could potentially use...but that still seems to be a lot of them.
3. I hate plants. I remember when I moved into this apartment that had South facing windows and my dad was so super excited about it because "those are the best for having plants." Ok, whatever. So he went out and bought me all kinds of plants. I hated them and begrudgingly watered them...but they lived, and thrived, just to spite me, I think...or maybe it was because of the South facing windows, I'm not sure.
4. My eyesight's not that bad; I just like wearing glasses...it's my niche.
5. However, contacts and eyedrops freak me out. So I guess it's a good thing I like my glasses.
6. I can't ride a bike. Stop laughing. Seriously, it's not funny.
7. I hate playing games. So don't ask me to join you in a rousing evening of Monopoly. I'd rather clean out my cat litter box all night.
So there you have it. Just a few things that make me, me. I guess I have to tag seven folks now to do the same...
1. Aspen
because she's quirky too.
2. Alowetta
because she's even quirkier than me! HA!
3. Christian
because there's power in numbers...if BOTH Mel and I tag him then maybe...just maybe.
4. Lisa
because I can't even imagine what's going to come out of her mouth
5. Nancy
because she's funnier than almost anyone I've ever met.
6. Jeremy because his humor is my humor.
7. Sarah
because they will probably be the most random things you can imagine...and that's what makes her great.
This was WAY easier than typing about what's ACTUALLY going on in my life.
Auld Lang Sine
HAPPY 2008!! I can't believe 2007 went as fast as it did. It was a rough one for me...filled with ups and a lot of downs. BUT, I'm ready to put it behind me and look to the future. This year will be filled with many life altering decisions. My boss announced his retirement last year...this means I am on the job hunt. Any ideas are appreciated. I have no clue where I want to go or what I want to do. So for now, I'm keeping my eyes open and all options are on the table. I have a year to find something great, so I'm not in a huge hurry. But the dilemmas seem endless. Do I want to stay where I am? Do I want to head back to New Mexico? Do I want to try my hand at living in NYC? Do I want to try out Austin? Ugh, adult decisions really suck sometimes. I am young, well, pretty young anyway, single, unattached to any man, baby or otherwise...so I really should see the world while I can. But sometimes the feeling of starting over in a new place seems overwhelming. I can just remember how tough it has been for me here...being all alone and having such a tough time finding true friends, and I'm not sure I can mentally do it all again. But what doesn't kill me only makes me stronger, right? I'm just gonna do a list of pros and cons...feel free to weigh in:
1. Stay here - I have had at least two solid leads for jobs in the DC area, plus I just got a promotion at work, which was completely unexpected. One job would be largely for the experience and the other would be largely for the pay check. But should I stay here? It's such a cold place and I have never really felt like I fit in. Plus, the minute I decided that I was done with DC, I felt like that Mac truck that was sitting on my shoulders was lifted right off. And I guess after I shared my plans with God, he did his usual chuckle and mixed things up again...making it seem like a good idea to stay here. Plus, I honestly moved here because I was convicted I was supposed to be here for something. Well, I've waited a year and a half to figure out just what that something was, only to feel I haven't found it at all. So have I truly not found it, or was it something I can't see just yet? Only time will tell, I suppose.
2. Go back to NM - New Mexico is my home. And when I go home, I realize just how much I am at home here. While I'm not so certain I could ever move back to my hometown, Albuquerque is a nice option for me. I have a friend there who is very influential, and she has been searching high and low for a job for me. I couldn't be more appreciative. Albuquerque is only 3.5 hours from Daven, Aspen, my parents, grand parents, aunt and uncle and my best friend. It's also super close to my brothers in Colorado. But it's New Mexico...meaning, I never really wanted to go back there. There is a big mental block about it that is very tough for me to get over. I know it seems silly, but I can be extremely stubborn...you can ask anyone.
3. New York City - I am truly in love with this city! I just soak up every second I can get here. It would be an incredibly tough city to live in...I think I can't afford DC, but that's nothing compared to NYC! But if I don't do it now...when will I ever get another chance? I probably couldn't stand it for very long, and that's ok with me...but just to say I lived there once would be a dream come true. One day...one day I will conquer NYC.
4. Austin - This one is probably my favorite option, and it's incredibly ironic because I've never even been to Austin. Austin is a capitol city so I could get back into politics; it's a college town, so I could go back to school or work in education again; it's close enough to home that I could make a weekend visit and yet it's still far enough away to make coming home a big deal; it's also a very young singles town; and I already have a few friends who live there. But...I have no solid leads on a job yet and that really concerns me.
So there you have it. This is what's going on in my head right now. So many choices...so little idea of actually how to make a decision. For now, I'm just trying to be patient and hope the choice is so obvious I won't be able question it. Here's to hoping '08 is the year I really start to shine. CHEERS!!
NO, I Will Not Marry You!
Ok, that Dr. Neil Clark is full of crap! I can hear my money flying out the window, and I'm no closer to finding any new friends. But if I had a nickel for everyone of those guys who wanted to marry me on eHarmony...I'd have a lot less than a dollar, but you know what I mean. They should actually name that site
http://www.hey-wanna-get-married-and-have-9-children.com/ But I guess that name got nixed in the brainstorming process. I don't know, I think it might have caught on. I am not interested, even in the slightest, in either of those things.
I think it's very hard to assess someone's personality by their answers to these silly obvious questions. The whole thing is so cumbersome. You have to go through this extensive process before you ever get to communicate freely with the guy. But by then, I'm so coached that I'm at a loss of what to say. The whole thing is backwards to me. I appreciate them doing the whole matching process...I like that they take the guessing work out of it for you, but I hate that I don't even get to see his personality until at least four communication steps later. I can be extremely witty over email, you know, I can type....then delete, rehearse, try again...all before pressing the send button. So, you'd think this online dating thing would be right up my alley. It might be, but I'll never get to show it at eHarmony...unless he has the stamina and I have the patience to wait that long. And for the record, I don't have the patience. I don't even really bother checking it anymore. I'm bored with you eHarmony. One guy requested communication with me who listed one of the top 5 things he couldn't live without as his "two ferrets." Ummm, I think I'll pass. I mean, I love my cat...I really do, but ferrets are just creepy.
I think I've decided I'm ok being single. I have a routine now that's comfortable and very low maintenance. The part I hate is the being lonely part...but even that lately has seemed less severe. I think I'm just in auto pilot mode...just cruising. But I'm okay with that for now. However, if you know of any cute, single, non-ferret-owning boys...I'm totally up for it.
She Did It
Chyanne got married. Sigh. The wedding was beautiful and she was beautiful...but me? I was a weepy mess. There she was, a vision in white, pledging herself to someone else. It was a precious, tender moment that I was not prepared for. She was all smiles, while I stood there biting my lip as hard as I could to keep from just coming apart at the seams...I came apart anyway. I am not prepared for the life I am now living...I have never felt more alone. It's not that she's gone or has any intentions of changing our relationship, but trust me, it will change. She now has a husband to care for. What does that mean, exactly? I don't know...all I know is that he now comes first. They will plan birthdays and Christmas's and anniversaries together. And will no doubt have chidren someday. I guess this is all a part of growing up, but dang it, I'm not ready to grow up and I'm not ready for my best friend to either!! This is obvious to those who know me...I live off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and wouldn't be able to cook a meal if my life depended on it...I only recently "invested" in plastic dishes...I live in the smallest apartment humanly possible and it doesn't bother me all that much...I have no intentions of ever buying a house, getting married, or having children. You could say I'm not ready to be a grown up. But this wedding sealed the deal for me as to how much I am not ready to have a married best friend. It just made me realize how dependent I actually am. She really is my sanity on most days. And to think she may not "be there" for me on a daily basis is just unbearable...even though I know this is ludicrous even as I type it, she is pretty dependent on me too. But I can't help but feel this uncertainty over our future relationship. I'm probably making a mountain out of a molehill, which is a trademark of mine, but this is me nonetheless; hyperbole and all. I'll learn to adjust and I'll be fine, it just might take me a little time.
Does Anybody Else...
Find it incredibly ironic how the theme song for Botox cosmetics is "Express Yourself"?
I mean, doesn't botox take all the expression out of your face...isn't that what it's supposed to do??
I Can't Believe I've Sunk This Low
Cue Natalie Cole singing "This will be (an everlasting love)" and Dr. Neil Clark talking about how those other sites provide a just "picture and a paragraph."
You've all seen the commercials. Well, I decided to join eHarmony.com. Keep your snide comments to yourself please. I have to say I am SUUUUPER embarrassed to even admit this. But it's the 21st century, right? I should have an open mind about new ideas and ways of meeting people. So, here goes.
I filled out the ridiculiously long survey they require for participation, and it pegged me pretty good. I'm "reserved, focused and flexible, steady, and content." Yeah, that sounds about right. Are other people out there like me too? I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
I'm doing all this at work...which is probably a no-no, and I'm almost finished. Put in my mailing address, credit card number (who knew finding a partner could be so expensive?!?!) click, submit. Whew, done. And THEN...it yells out over the speakers on my computer "WELCOME to the eHarmony network!" Are you kidding me?? As if this whole thing isn't mortifying enough, you have to announce it that I'm a loser and am looking for love online. I don't think I've ever moved so quickly to the mute button on my computer. Geez, could this get any worse?
So far I have seven "perfect" matches according to the great doctor of online love. I must say I'm kinda underwhelmed. I'm probably just being too picky. It's hard to determine someone's awesomeness by their answers to five "canned" questions.
I'll keep you posted on this crazy adventure.
This will be...oh shut it Natalie. We get it already.
One Year Reflections
My how time flies. I just recently passed my one year mark here in DC. What a wild year it has been. I've learned a lot about myself this past year...what I can handle and what I can't. Not every day has been easy, not every day has been fun, but everyday I have grown. Growing up is hard to do sometimes. I've learned to be frugal, I've learned to be okay being alone, I've learned a lot about politics, I've learned to depend on myself and only myself, and I've learned coffee can do wonders for my ability to stay focused at work. Life isn't always what you imagine it will be, but that's okay. The fun sometimes is in the not knowing. I look forward to another year of ups and downs in this big city. So bring it on...I can handle it.
